barely
updated.
there's
more
to
life
than
this.



Other diaries:

6*22*01

My words don't spread my message of love

Captain Blue-Green, where are you? This story is getting bland and boring without you here. Last I heard, Peach was happy to be with you. Her heart wasn't falling out without a destination in mind. On that dusty southern road her intentions were good, and on your bed with those cool, spring touched sheets, she wanted nothing more than to be with you. And when she told me this, she cried, not just from her eyes, but from everywhere in her body. She let me touch her tears, each of them filled with her desires and longing for you, Captain Blue-Green.

At some point in my pathetic teenage life, I hope to accomplish something. And now that I've stopped with this running around business, pretending to be something important, I can finally feel the full blow of my insignificance. Now that I am not surrounded by people, and now that my emotions have settled to the bottom of my head, I still remain somewhat stone-set as to how I feel.

I'd like some Jamba Juice right now...
I'm tired of fucking up, point stated and true. Things don't go well for very long in my life. It's my vicious cycle, part of which I put myself through. I haven't felt the warmth of my own tears in weesks, and I know I'm losing emotion gradually, due in part to the fact that I'm dealing with everyone else's shit. I'm working, blah blah blah.

I'm confused, I'm filled, but I'm empty. I need to sleep, but I'm not tired, and I know it's getting late. And I shouldn't bottle things up the way I'm doing it right now, but I can't help it. And it won't make me feel better to talk about any of it, or to even confess any of it onto this thing I should call a diary. Sometimes I think I haven't tried hard enough with my friends. Sometimes I think that they question my love for them. And I begin to hurt...



regress /progress



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