I fumble clumsily with the keys on this board, trying to feel me through them. And this is where I tell you all, that those feelings of being ditched and deserted are coming back now. Maybe it is the sunny cold which brings me back to this time last year, when my then boyfriend would ditch me for his then best friend (who's link I will leave out), and eventually they would somehow fall into some strange sort of love that I would never understand. I would be left to wonder if he was sleeping at some 3 AM when he was really out with her at the airport or sitting stowed away in his stolen car.

I feel this cold nearing my heart, soon enveloping it in it's brash grasp. But my happiness is worth more than feeling all of this over again, like a bad Wayans brother's remake of a movie. But this morning, this is what I wake up to feeling.