i'm a little annoyed, but i'll deal. it'll go away when i wake up tomorrow morning anyway.

the family is gone for a few days, which means that i'm all alone (besides annelise and kristine), so whoever wants to come visit may do so. just call me before.

sometimes we read or write to keep our minds off of things. but when i want to remember, i play music. it's a nice system that we have worked out.

i had a feeling something bad happened to skip. these premonitions are scaring me. i get them all too often when it's someone i'm close to.

autographs and apologies is a sad song. too bad most people don't have it. it's unreleased. it makes me think of people who just give up, who make empty promises and do it without even thinking. it hurts sometimes, but i try not to take it personally. so much for apologies, so much for the promises i never meant to keep...

the days are tolerable, but only when the sun is out and it warms the inside of my car. the nights get hard because there is an ever present lonliness that i won't get over for a while. it's all part of life - losing important things, making mistakes, and growing because of them. i'll never stop growing until i die.

i just want to fall asleep for a while, until i wake up to something beautiful. there's not too many precious things in life. there's no benevolent force here. empty space and cluttered thoughts.

if love were easy, it'd be great. i suppose it's the challenges that really make it what it is though. the entirety of love is relative. there are times where i feel like no one has the conception of it that i have, that everything i try to give is taken away from me and taken advantage of. it makes me never want to love again, if this is the way it'll always be for me. i'll just continue to live in my little world with my cingular belief of love, and hope that one day someone will come along who believes it to be the same way as i do. that way, i can finally be happy. i can finally feel that love is infinite.

i want to see mountains and grassy plains that make my heart soar.